Another Bribe in the Wall

In the impermeable wall of red tapism, here comes another bribe...

After losing my wallet in Noida, I asked a nearest cop, which chowki to file the complaint. I was directed to the sector 14 police station, where I was told that I have come to the wrong place and I would have to go to the Sec 2 golchakkar chowki. There a nice and polite incharge redirected me to the Sec 20 Police Station. At the station :

Sir, I want to file a report for lost wallet.

Write it on two plain sheets and give it to me.

Sir, I dont have any paper with me.

What do you do with those specs of your if you dont read and write? Cant you carry your own paper?

Sir, I dont have 'em, please provide.

Ok go to the other room.

After standing there in the other room.

Sir, can I please have two sheets of plain paper?

NO.

Sir...

NO.

Back to the other room...

Sir, paper is not available there...

Looks up to me - So, what can I do? Talk to that other guy.

Other guy.

Sir ... Can I please have two sheets of plain paper?

No.

The very same moment, a lady sitting on the floor tells the man ... "Kyon pareshaan kar rahe ho... de do paper..." (Dont bug him, give him the paper.)

This coming from the lady, he have me one A4 sheet, folded it in two, tucked a carbon paper and said - Write on it. How will you write? Hindi aati hai? ya angregi mein likhega?

Obligated, I jotted down the details, contents of the wallet were important to mention. When I went back there was another man standing behind me... Same case, lost his Driving License, filing a report.

He was asked Rs. 120/- for the FIR (or whatever it was). On denail, the police man threw back his report, saying go get an affidavit made on your own. He said sir, please ... On realizing that he will have to pour in some money, he gave Rs. 50/-. This angered the police man. But some futile pleading made him realize he will have to shell out more. Another Rs.. 20 satiated the police man's hunger.

My turn! He looks up to me : Haan, tumhara kya karna hai (Yes, what should I do with your case?)

Sir, please accept it, I have lost my wallet, no cash available.

Then I cant help you. Come in the evening.

Sir, please...

I check into my wallet - found Rs. 50 in three tens and a twenty. I offered him the three tens.

Sir...

What do you think of us? Are we beggers?

Sir, this is all I have, and I have to go back to my office, God forbid if I need this money...

No, you come in the eve.

Silently I offered him the twenty.

Aaj kal ke ladke bhi... Bike chalate hain, julfien udate hain, ******* ko taad te hain and walled ghoma dete hain. Pareshaan kise hona padta hai? Humein...

(Lads these days drive bikes recklessly, watching the babes on the road, and all this builds up trouble for us...)

The trouble : One stamp on my copy of the report. And one lousy signature.